All Parents are NOT Created Equal!

Posted By on May 12, 2009

While most people would think that the statement in the title is obvious, I never appreciated just how “not equal” parents can be.  One of the biggest disappointments I found from teaching this past year was seeing that in some cases, what I was teaching in Religious Education class was not actively supported or practiced at home.  So, when I saw a post on the OSV Daily Take blog about one parent’s reaction to what her daughter was told by a friend, I wasn’t all that surprised.

Any teacher will tell you that the best way to foster real learning is by having parents partner with them in teaching your child.  It is important for parents to support and reinforce at home what is taught in school because it adds validity to the subject and makes it more practical.  Religious education is no different.  As a Catechist, I go into my classroom with the expectation that, since parents cared enough to have their children learn the faith, this education must be important to them.  While at the end of the day it may be important to the parents, that message isn’t making it to the student, most likely because it is not openly reinforced at home.

I asked my class how many of them had bibles at home, whether their personal one or a family one.  Of my 14 students, 3 raised their hands.  I’m sure more families had one, but the student didn’t know it and that likely means that it’s not used much.  How many them pray everyday?  3 raised their hands.  How may go to Mass every Sunday?  5, and reasons for not going included parents going to Mass too early for the student and sporting events conflicting with Mass.  When I asked why they don’t just go to Mass on Saturday night or a different Sunday Mass, I got blank stares back.

Now, I don’t mean to imply that parents in my area don’t care, don’t believe, or don’t want to participate in their child’s religious upbringing.  I see many parents with their children at Mass on Sunday.  I hear them answering their children’s questions about the readings, etc.  What I am saying is that one hour a week on Sunday by going to Mass isn’t enough.  Sending them to Religious Education classes isn’t enough.  To get the message across, they need to practice their faith at home in full view of their children.  Children take many queues from their parents.  If Mass isn’t mandatory then it must not be important.  If children don’t see their parents go to the Sacrament of Reconciliation often, then it must not be necessary.  If they don’t see parents praying, then it must be a waste of time.

Parents, please show your children just how important your faith is, because a Catechist can only succeed if they are an extension of you.  As for me, I will go into next year with my eyes wide open and prepared to hit this challenge head on.  It’s time to get the creativity mojo working and getting the message through.

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About the author

My name is Carlos Torres, and for better or for worse, I am a Catechist. As a Catechist, I help supplement the religious education that parents give at home with focused and detailed lessons around Scripture and Tradition as taught by the Church. Now, I have no background in teaching, much less in dealing with a group of tweens and teens who don’t want to be with me, in a classroom, on a weeknight, learning about faith; yet week after week, I and many other Catechists do just that by letting the Holy Spirit guide us in planting those seeds and helping fulfill the Church’s mission to “go and make disciples”.

Comments

  • http://platytera.blogspot.com/ Christian

    Hey! I just found your blog. I teach 6th graders too, this was my 5th year. Before that I taught RCIA and Adult class. I blog about my class just like you do. Regarding this post on parents, I’m satisfied if they bring the kids to me on time, and regularly. I intend for the kids to learn their faith well enough to evangelize their lukewarm parents, if need be.

    Have you seen this site? It’s not well attended, but it could shape up into something useful….go have a look a make a few comments: http://forums.loyolapress.com/faith-formation-f9/

  • http://platytera.blogspot.com/ Christian

    Hey! I just found your blog. I teach 6th graders too, this was my 5th year. Before that I taught RCIA and Adult class. I blog about my class just like you do. Regarding this post on parents, I’m satisfied if they bring the kids to me on time, and regularly. I intend for the kids to learn their faith well enough to evangelize their lukewarm parents, if need be.

    Have you seen this site? It’s not well attended, but it could shape up into something useful….go have a look a make a few comments: http://forums.loyolapress.com/faith-formation-f9/

  • http://platytera.blogspot.com/ Christian

    “As a Catechist, I go into my classroom with the expectation that, since parents cared enough to have their children learn the faith, this education must be important to them.”

    I think most parents want for their kids what they had: enough ‘religion’ to be able to receive Communion, and be Confirmed. Most of us were not catechized well enough to have faith grow with us into adulthood, so most Catholic adults don’t know faith beyond their own 8th grade pre-Confirmation instruction. It’s not ideal. But we can be thankful that we have another chance with the kids we’re teaching now, and that their parents do care enough to bring them to class, even if that’s the limit of their involvement.

  • http://platytera.blogspot.com/ Christian

    “As a Catechist, I go into my classroom with the expectation that, since parents cared enough to have their children learn the faith, this education must be important to them.”

    I think most parents want for their kids what they had: enough ‘religion’ to be able to receive Communion, and be Confirmed. Most of us were not catechized well enough to have faith grow with us into adulthood, so most Catholic adults don’t know faith beyond their own 8th grade pre-Confirmation instruction. It’s not ideal. But we can be thankful that we have another chance with the kids we’re teaching now, and that their parents do care enough to bring them to class, even if that’s the limit of their involvement.

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About the author

My name is Carlos Torres, and for better or for worse, I am a Catechist. As a Catechist, I help supplement the religious education that parents give at home with focused and detailed lessons around Scripture and Tradition as taught by the Church. Now, I have no background in teaching, much less in dealing with a group of tweens and teens who don’t want to be with me, in a classroom, on a weeknight, learning about faith; yet week after week, I and many other Catechists do just that by letting the Holy Spirit guide us in planting those seeds and helping fulfill the Church’s mission to “go and make disciples”.